Master Pharmacist
"Dispensing wisdom since long before it was a controlled substance."
Contraindications: boredom, bad vibes, under-seasoned food. Side effects: extreme competence.
Some people get older. Rich gets better — like a fine drum solo that just keeps building, a wave that never breaks wrong, or a prescription that somehow gets stronger every year.
"56: vintage, not old. Aged to absolute perfection."
You're the kind of friend that makes everyone around you cooler just by showing up. And for that, we are eternally grateful — and slightly jealous.
"Old guys are the best because they know all the shortcuts — and still take the scenic route."
"Still cooler than a freshly cracked freezer aisle on a hot day."
"Beats the alternative — and still keeping perfect time."
"Still catching waves. Still shredding. Side effects may include awesomeness."
🌟 The Many Legends of Rich 🌟
Click each card for a surprise!
Drummer Extraordinaire
"Keeping the beat since before most people knew what a beat was."
Still hits harder than a Monday alarm. The groove is strong with this one.
Lifelong Skateboarder
"56 = still absolutely sending it, no question."
The only person who makes a kickflip look cooler at 56 than at 16.
Wave Rider
"Totally tubular then. Totally tubular now. Always will be."
Still catching waves, still making it look effortless. The ocean shows respect.
World-Class Dad
"Cape not optional. Coffee: mandatory. Dad jokes: inevitable."
Grill master. Fix-it legend. Embarrassing dance champion. World-class human.
Here's to You, Rich 🥂
You are one of a kind — a genuine, hilarious, talented, and deeply cool human being. Lifetime friends are rare. The kind who skate, surf, drum, heal, and dad their way through life with total style? Even rarer.
Here's to 56 years of being absolutely legendary, and to however many more years of still sending it at full volume.
Happy Birthday, Rich. You're the best. ❤️
with love,
Greg